It's Friday. Sweet. It's been a whirlwind of a month already. So many people in and out, events here and there. I wake up tired each morning.
Reason being, one half of my patio blinds have weirdly come off track, therefore I can't close my blinds. Yep. Wide open. All eyes on me. FLIP. And, since I'm almost entirely
Mr. I.Can't.Fix.Anything.Regardless.Of.My.Sincere.Efforts.To.Do.So
I have yet to solve the bigger, actual problem at hand: the sun rises in the east and my patio faces due east. What a bitch. Another problem is that, nowadays, the sun rises around 5:30 AM.
Early bird.
A couple..no no..a smattering of dust particle-filled sun rays BURST into my room, not even bothering to knock. Rude.
EYES OPEN, READY OR NOT.
Son of a bitch, shit, eff, what time is it??!! Oh, 5:42 AM. Perfect. Waking up an hour and a half early is...perfect.
Let me be overly dramatic for a second: my bedroom is comparable to a tanning bed, minus the coconut smell and butt cheek crevice tan lines. Although, for some reason, my horrid tanktop tan line from two weeks ago never seems to fully blend in, shocking considering the amount of early-morning UV exposure I receive. J,M and J, ARE THERE ANY PERKS HERE!? Son of a bitch, mother ef.
OK, I feel better...Anyway:
I try my best to go back to sleep, god knows I'm tired enough to sleep til dinner. But, I can't sleep. It's so effing bright and my anxiety level has freakishly spiked realizing my precious sleep time before work is dwindling faster than Sarah Palin's presidential cred. As a buffer, I typically place a pillow directly atop my head...making sure it's merely sitting on my head and is in no way wrapped around or forced upon my head. No clamping. Just sitting atop. Nicely. A gentle breeze could easily knock it over.
I have issues when it comes to feeling smothered. In more ways than one.
I carefully rested the pillow on the side of my face as I tried to lull myself back to sleep, despite the rude awakening. Thought I was in the clear but, turns out, I must have moved my head ever-so because, this morning, my pillow fell off of my face, Jack-and-Jilled its way onto my nightstand, knocked over a half-empty...no no, it's Friday, a half-full glass of water, making the water then spill off of my nightstand and onto my latest issue of Details magazine, which, I might add, I haven't even read yet nor did I get to smell the cologne ads which is my favorite part of reading new magazines.
The John Varvatos wicker-chair-looking cologne, as of late, has made a stunning impression and may very well be an upcoming purchase. But who even knows now because the pages are sticking together.
SON OF A BITCH MOTHERFUCKER
I go in and out of turrets, just FYI.
TGIF.
