i feel like, sometimes, my point here gets lost.
not on this blog, not on the worldwide web
but in life.
so i'll use this platform to let you know something:
i have a purpose. i don't know what it is, but i know there is one.
i never have the answers, instead i get completely lost in theory. i'm not sure how the world was created, be it by god or be it bacteria. either/or is fine with me.
but one thing i make no mistake about is this:
i was born a son of two loving parents, grew up in a family that set a standard of doing the right thing, always. at the end of the day, i always knew that i did what i could. and i did what i should.
i was never deemed smart by any teacher. i was never super popular. i never won any contest.
i was average.
and i knew full well of my average existence the entire time, and i still do today.
but the funny thing is that i embrace that which is average. it's practically the only thing i know. and it's never done me wrong. most times.
because sometimes my tall friends make me feel short, although i'm an average height.
sometimes i feel like i look decent, although there's always someone better looking, more fit, better hair, whiter teeth. i'll never trump on any of those things.
i have average height, i have average talent, i have average style, i have average looks, i have average hair, i have average teeth.
all of it leading up to this average persona i cannot escape, not that i need to.
although, as bad as it sounds, i've never felt particularly important. let's not confuse importance with love. i've been nothing but loved by those whom matter.
but feeling important is a different story. well, i take that back, once during my college years a professor made me feel important. she'll never know that she did so, but she did it in a way that was specific to me and me only. no one else thought i was important. it was my little secret.
i guess that's all i needed. just one confirmation to get me on my way.
since then i've met many average people. and for these people i have great respect. it takes one to know one.
but what about those of you in the spotlight? what about the forgotten? what about you?
bad? lost? misunderstood? exceptional? gifted? who determines any of that?
does it change you? if you do something considered above average, does that validate you as different from me?
maybe it's talent, maybe it's money, maybe it's luck.
whatever it is, i don't really care. i like who i am. i like what i offer.
watching the golden globes started this whole subject. they're all so impressed with one another, they marvel, they reward. but why? i'm not impressed. none of them are impressed by what i do, but that doesn't make it any less important, does it?
or any less meaningful?
my dad was a cop, a trooper, a chief of police. he has risked his life for others. he has looked in the eyes of the bad guy. he has saved lives. where's his award?
my dad isn't exceptional, but he never wanted to be. he was an average man with an amazing heart. and that's what's important.
that deserves a spotlight. that deserves a golden globe.
and having witnessed this firsthand, i'll carry on in his average image.
i'm full of heart. did you know that? i put myself in your shoes, and then i walk in them. i help. i empathize. i sympathize. i encourage. i relate. and i listen.
i'd do just about anything for a lot of people, sometimes regardless if they even deserve it.
but i'd be lying if i said i didn't want to be more than that. more than average. above average? to me, that would be like writing a best seller. to be an author, a good one at that. woah.
i want a cabin in the rockies, a pied-a-terre in nyc. i want stainless steel appliances. i want it all.
i can dream, can't i?
coming from an average family, with average looks, with an average job, with average ability...i have to remind myself constantly that, someday sumner, someday you'll find exactly what you're looking for.
in so many ways.
i am an average man. i am ryan sumner. i am you. i am every other person that has ever felt left out of the bigger and the better.
i will never be at any award show. and that's okay.
nor can i guarantee that i'll ever impress anybody...but i will guarantee you this: i will close my eyes tonight, breathe easily, and sleep well.
after all, i do what i can, and i do what i should.
the end.
